Wednesday, April 09, 2008


I have been thinking about a few things lately. One, how lucky I am to have a husband around as often as he is and family close by who love and watch Micah occasionally, and Two, how blessed we are to have a healthy and happy baby. I'll tell you why:

At church on Sunday I went up to a girl who had been sitting in front of us all by herself. I'm so glad I did because I don't know if anyone else would have spoken to her. This was her first Sunday at our church. Her husband is in Iraq and she has two very small children - a 2 year old and a 6 month old. The father has never even met the younger child. The woman found our church through Focus on the Family. There were a few choices they gave her, so it sounds like she's going to be shopping around a little bit trying to find the right fit. She will fit in well at our church if she comes back because there are a lot of young moms in our church. I pointed out another girl whose husband had been in the military and who had lived on base where she lives now. She is not from around here so she has absolutely no family in the area and her husband is not around and it seems like there aren't any Christians in her circle of friends on base because she had to go to Focus on the Family to find a church to attend. She had her 2nd baby without her husband, so I'm thinking there had to be some support from others on base, but who watched her oldest while she went into labor? Who took her to the hospital? How is she surviving with 2 small children!? She is also going to school. I just can't imagine. I think it's tough when 2 days out of the whole MONTH Dave goes straight from work to his men's group for Bible study. This gives me some perspective.

Also, I'm thankful that my husband isn't gone all that much because I have other friends who have husbands that started a business almost a year ago and work really long hours. It's the time in our lives when our husbands are work hard trying to build their businesses or make their climb up the corporate ladder and the time in our lives when us women are having kids and wishing our husbands were around more to help with the kids or with things around the house. It seems like it's a tough stage of life (but I know I haven't been through many stages)! Those friends of mine are lonely and struggling and I've been trying to think of how I can encourage them, but I'm not very creative or thoughtful. People have said that even just hanging out with them for a couple of hours means a lot. Any ideas?

The second thing I've been thinking about is how thankful I am to have a healthy baby. I know Micah is a gift from God and I am so thankful and blessed to have been trusted to care for him and I can only pray that God lets me watch over him all my life. Some parents aren't so lucky. My aunt and uncle had to say goodbye to their precious son due to a brain tumor when he was only 21. At least they were given 21 years with him and they have the blessed hope of reuniting with him again in heaven. But how incredibly difficult to outlive your child.

There is a family who have a little girl very close to Micah's age and are dealing with a brain tumor as well. A friend of theirs, a girl whose blog I read religiously, wrote a very moving piece about their situation. I encourage you to follow that link and read their story. If there is anything we can do to help this family in need that they might be able to get the best care for little Emily and spare her parents the pain of losing her at such a young age, well then, let us band together and help, pray, do whatever we can to petition her case before Jehovah-Rapha, the God who heals.


Shannon said...

As a mother who is currently "widowed" while my husband is in school, I would also say that spending time with these friends whose husbands are really busy would probably be great.

If they have kids and can get a babysitter, just a night out for coffee and dessert would probably be lots of fun. And if they can't, maybe you could bring coffee and dessert to their house in the evening once the kids are asleep? I know I have had a few friends that have hung out with me or met me for coffee or lunches with my kids and sometimes without them, when I can swing it. And it has made a world of difference.

Because when my husband is away I really miss the adult interaction. Those are my thoughts. Hope that helps.

Anonymous said...

Hi Cheri,
I can see from your reflections that you are sharing from a "mother's heart"! We always want to nurture and protect our children. Yes, Micah is a wonderful gift!! We too are grateful for the gift of Jon's life. We do believe he is safe in God's arms, yet, as you say, missing him continues to be incredibly difficult.

I read the story on the link about the baby and her family -- such a difficult experience for all! I will lift them up in prayer.

Aunt Phyllis

Cheri said...

Shannon, thanks for the advice. I still haven't done anything for those girls, but one of these days I will. What is hard is that both of them are very confident and seem like they have many, many friends, and who am I to try and hang out with such cool girls?! But the other side of it is that I know they are lonely, I've heard them say it, and I'm sure they'd want someone to hang out with. So, when I stop being so self-centered I will be a nice friend. One of these days...

Aunt Phyllis, thank you for your prayers for the young family of little Emily. I realize it must never get any easier for you, and I'm so sorry.

Danielle H. said...

I have no advice because I realize I'm on the dawn of being in that kinda situation. I'll have 3.5 months of being a psuedo single mom and trying to work like 4 hours a day and still take care of the house and of course Abby. Its going to be crazy and hard, but I can't imagine how much harder its going to be for Matt. yeah we'll have webcam, but still he's going to miss out.

my advice: cookies are yummy. no thats not a real suggestion, I just got an urge for a cookie. I think just being understanding and offering to help out however you can is the key.